Books, Creativity

Who else likes a Goblin? The daughter and I do.

As the offspring of two bona fide bibliomaniacs, my toddler daughter continuously demands to have books read to her.

Some of the books she likes I find boring (but as a dutiful father soldier on reading them to her) and some of them I quite enjoy (like everything Donaldson and Scheffler cook up).

But now for the first time we seem to have found an age-appropriate book that Daddy might even be more enthusiastic about than the daughter: Nobody Likes a Goblin by Ben Hatke.

Goblin lives in a dungeon, together with Skeleton, his best friend. It is a simple life of feeding the rats and lighting the torches, until ADVENTURERS STORM THE DUNGEON and steal all the contents of the treasure room. They even take Skeleton. So Goblin has to walk out into the world to get his friend back. But, as the neighboring Hill Troll reminds him, nobody likes a goblin and thus he is constantly being hunted by farmers, inn keepers and elves until he is reunited with his friend and [spoiler warning] becomes the Goblin King.

This is a magic book. Sometimes when my Daughter is fast asleep I just read it to myself.

My only problem with this book of goblins, magic and elves is … that it is totally unrealistic.

I mean, if you had a dungeon with a full treasure room, would you guard it with a single goblin and a single skeleton? Of course not. You would at least make it an Orc and a Lich and throw in some deadly traps for good measure.

An adventurer’s life is not just about money. It is a constant quest for  experience and self perfection. Imagine how disappointed the adventurers were when they only found a lonely skeleton in the treasure room. How many XPs is a skeleton? 2? It will take ages to level up … of course they were grumpy …

And speaking of the adventurers… how am I supposed to teach my daughter the principles of effective dungeon warfare, if this pack of beginners has the wizard charge in first, like he was the bloody tank. No no no, I keep telling my daughter, the fighters go first. That’s why they got more hit points and a higher armor class. Come on, it’s not that hard!

And before I forget .. what is the deal with this lady who suddenly sits among the gold on the cart, is really good with a sword, and looks just like the statue from treasure room? I need explanations!

Anyhow, the Daughter and I love this book. And even if you have never been a role-playing nerd you will be able to enjoy it. Just take it as a story of an underdog who overcomes great obstacles to find success and happiness in life … and a boot to gnaw on.


One thought on “Who else likes a Goblin? The daughter and I do.

  1. Maybe the sorcerer was bored with being a support and/or ranged attacker and tried the challenge of being a tankzard. Actually, if you google tank wizard, it seems quite common. But generally I agree, you should probably paint by numbers before you go all Picasso.

    Another thing: If you are a high level adventurer, you actually prefer badly defended areas with lots of loot and try to avoid high level mobs, which are immune against most attacks and move faster than Usain Bolt on peds.

    Liked by 1 person

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